Tonight’s Neil Gaiman-penned episode of Doctor Who may well come to be regarded as a classic of the series. Not just the rejuvenated 2005 series, but in the entire run of the show.
The Doctor’s Wife is really a reference to The Doctor’s closest female companion, the ‘person’ he’s travelled with the longest throughout time and space. Read on and expect spoilers, friends. What we’ve done tonight is chosen our favourite quotes from tonight’s episode and given you a quick interpretation of what’s happening.
There’s also a full review of The Doctor’s Wife on our Unreality Shout site. Click here to read it! Let’s get cracking with the quotes then, shall we?
The Doctor: “See that snake? The mark of the Corsair. Fantastic bloke. He had that snake as a tattoo in every regeneration. Didn’t feel like himself unless he had the tattoo. Or herself a couple of times.”
That’s right, kiddies – all your favourite Time Lords and Ladies can change gender. Maybe that should be regenderate? That leaves casting for the Twelfth Doctor wide open, doesn’t it?
The Doctor: “What have I stolen?” Idris: “Me. Are you going to steal me? You have stolen me. You are stealing me. Oh. Tenses are difficult, aren’t they?”
OMFG! The living embodiment of the TARDIS. Suranne Jones owned this role, dropping little teasers about the complex and deep relationship between The Doctor and his time machine. I loved the “who stole who” debate they had!
Unidentified Time Lord: “If you are receiving this message, please help me. Send a signal to the high council of Time Lords on Gallifrey. I am still alive, I don’t know where I am…”
An evil TARDIS-eating entity has lured The Doctor into a bubble universe in order to munch on his blue box. He’s already killed hundreds of Time Lords, but surely he’s noticed supply issues in the last 6 years or so?
Rory: “He’ll be fine, he’s a Time Lord.” Amy: “That’s just what they’re called. Doesn’t mean he knows what he’s doing.”
Rory overestimating The Doctor’s abilities while Amy displays her usual treatment of the last Time Lord as some kind of shambling idiot. Based on the evidence of the last four episodes, which one do you think is right?
Idris: “Yes, that’s me. A Type 40 TARDIS. I was already a museum piece when you were young. And the first time you touched my console, you said…” The Doctor: “I said you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever known.” Idris: “And then you stole me. And I stole you.” The Doctor: “I borrowed you.”
How can you not adore this dialogue between The Doctor and Idris, told in the style of two lovers reminiscing on the first time they met. Beautiful, poetic. An all-time Doctor Who classic moment.
The Doctor: “I’m a madman with a box without a box. I’m stuck down the plughole at the end of the universe in a stupid old junkyard.”
I love this little quote – mostly because Doctor Who started in a scrapyard all the way back in 1963. What a clever little cross-reference. Just makes this episode all the better.
The Doctor: “Valley of half-eaten TARDISes. Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Idris: “I’m thinking all of my sisters are dead. That they were devoured and that we are looking at their corpses.” The Doctor: “Sorry no, I wasn’t thinking that.” Idris: “No, you were thinking you could build a working TARDIS console out of the broken remnants of a hundred different models. And you don’t care that it’s impossible.” The Doctor: “It’s not impossible as long as we’re alive. Rory and Amy need me. So yeah, we’re going to build a TARDIS.”
Sometimes a Time Lord has no time for tact and sensitivity. This is one of those times. So The Doctor and Idris go all A Team and build a TARDIS out of scrap. Perfect.
The Doctor: “Since we’re talking with mouths – not really an opportunity that comes along very often – I’d just like to say that YOU have never been very reliable.”
To which the TARDIS replies that she’s always taken The Doctor to where he needed to go. I’d still like to know how he missed Amelia Pond by 14 years but was able to catch River Song falling off the side of a skyscraper with pinpoint precision. In time and space.
The Doctor: “She’s a woman and she’s the TARDIS.” Amy: “Did you wish really hard?”
Brilliant quote. The Doctor does seem to have a thinly veiled lust for his vehicle. I’m sure there’s a joke we could make about being bigger on the inside, but we won’t go there, will we readers?
House: “Fear me, I’ve killed hundreds of Time Lords.” The Doctor: “Fear me, I’ve killed all of them.”
Very macho confrontation between The Doctor and the House as to which is the bigger genocidal maniac.
“The only water in the forest is the River.”