Last night’s EastEnders – the anticlimax of the year!

Archie EastEnders

When last night’s EastEnders began with Archie tied up and blindfolded atop a big tarpaulin, I thought, “Oh wow, this really is going to be good… Phil’s going to really go through with it!” but no, he didn’t… not even close!

No “givin’ ‘im a slap” no “teachin’ ‘im a lesson” – nada, nil point EastEnders for the biggest anticimax ever!

Now, maybe I’m just a ghoul who’s eager for fictional blood but after all the build-up and all the secrecy regarding what Peggy had asked Phil to do – namely kill Archie – I really was expecting him to actually do it.

Archie and Phil, EastEnders

The blowtorch was lit, the tool bag-stroke-torture bag was menacingly dropped and the cement mixer was going… and what happened? Archie got wet… That was it; he got wet, and was even handed a towel! I’ve rarely been so disappointed in a show; not since Bobby Ewing showed up in the shower after Pammy had dreamed his icky demise… it was a big fat let down.

Of course the show’s writers’ have now left the door wide open for Archie to come back in some way to probably torture Peggy and/or Ronnie but to have Phil simply give him a shower was a big let down for me. The most violent thing that happened to Arch Villain Archie was being tumbled – albeit relatively gently – into the pit!

Archie wet in EastEnders

And again, as sadistic and ghoulish as it may be, I really wanted to see Archie get his comeuppance, but instead, he got a lecture about how he’s too old to “start again” but wasn’t that what he’d just done with Peggy? So that argument was somewhat negated.

And, as Phil said several times, Archie’s got a couple of million in the bank but what he mistakenly said was “What good’s that gonna do ya?” Erm, quite a lot I’d say…

It’ll buy him a nice place in the sun and a nice young gold-digger with which to share it, so he got off very much too easily for witholding the whole Danielle info which ultimately led to her death… and to quote Ned Flanders from The Simpsons, it was “wrong diddly wrong wrong.”

And then, Peggy had made Phil what would seem to be a traditional EastEnd after-murder dinner of steak and mash which, when she found out Phil hadn’t murdered Archie as requested, she wouldn’t let him eat and in fact ordered him out of the pub when just seconds earlier, she’d been telling Phil how much better he was than brother Grant but on learning he’d let Archie go, she started throwing “Grant’s better than you” insults at him…

Archie, Peggy, Phil, EastEnders

And what mother would ask her son to kill someone and then berate him and belittle him when he didn’t?? She’s not going to win any awards for Mother Of the Year that’s for sure!

Maybe Phil will buy her a Mother’s Day card next year that reads: “Sorry I didn’t kill your fella, I bottled out ‘cos I’m a bit yella, but I love you mum, you’re really special; a nasty bitch and a poisonous nag, but I didn’t want to be a big old lag…  And roses are red, violets are blue, you hate me and I hate you. Love Phil”

So what did you think of it? Let us know if you think it’s a good idea to leave the door open for Archie to come back and terrorise Walford’s residents or would you rather have seen him become as one with Phil’s garage pit?

Lynn is an editor and writer here at Unreality TV and is trained psychotherapist and the author of two books. She's addicted to soaps, period drama and reality TV shows such as X Factor, I'm A Celeb and Big Brother.