There’s so much going on in Corrie at the moment – both on screen and off – we thought we’d bring you a round up of the latest gossip and goings on from the cobbles but be warned, this article contains info about upcoming storylines so if you don’t like spoilers, don’t read on!

To start with, I suppose it was inevitable, but I’m saddened/horrified to hear that Coronation Street actor Ian Reddington – who plays loser in love Vernon – plans to release his on-screen ballad ‘Don’t Fall Into The Mason’s Arms’ and hopes it’ll be a Christmas number one. Oh god; come back Cliff, all is forgiven.

Earlier this month, Vernon Tomlin hoped to win back the heart of his blonde bomb site wife Liz by wooing her with the song which referred to her infatuation with bookie Harry Mason and his hope that she wouldn’t ‘fall into his arms’. It’s not his arms you wanna worry about her falling into or on Vern, but actually, there’ll be nothing of him to present any danger as of next month because both he and his odious son Dan are offski.

Both have been written out and Peter Barlow is making a comeback instead. Mind you, thre’s no fear of Liz being driven into the sunset by Peter either because the actor who plays him, Chris Gascoyne, has been banned from driving for a year for being over the limit. Perhaps he heard ‘Don’t fall into the Mason’s arms’ and was drowning his sorrows… as we all will be if we have to hear it again.

Anyway, Ian told The Mirror, “I’ve been blown away by the response to the song, which was written by Street scriptwriters. There are talks to see if we can release it in time for Christmas. It would be fantastic to see it at No 1.” No Ian, it would be a crime against music to see it at number one.

‘Scouting For Girls’ frontman Roy Stride composed the music, while Corrie writer Carmel Morgan wrote the lyrics. Well, sorry Carmel and Roy but it’s pants and if it gets to number 1 at Christmas – or indeed any other time – then I may have to jump off a cliff.

In other news, there’s to be a new family on the street soon, who may take up residence in the house that’s about to be vacated by a lot of the Morton clan, praise be. The only one of them that I like is Jerry, and possibly Teresa actually. Anyway, the new folks are called the Windass family – I know – and consist of husband Eddie (Steve Huison), wife Donna (Debbie Rush), son Carl (Mikey North) and Eddie’s brother, Len (Conor Ryan).

Apparently though, the writers say their names may change before they appear on screen. Let’s hope so because it’ll be nightmare of puns otherwise; hot air, full of it, gassing on… it really would be endless. It’s being said that the toxic but somewhat reformed David Platt will finally meet his match in Eddie Windass. Maybe he’s going to fart him to death.

It’s a pity that Liam’s about to josh it isn’t it? In case you didn’t already know, filming took place during the summer of Liam Connor’s (Rob James-Collier) final scenes. It seems it involves the Peak District, a cave and the street’s uber villain Tony. However, Liam will live on because it turns out Maria’s pregnant with his baby. Awwwwwwwwwww. Filming of Liam’s funeral took place this week and it seems that Tony’s not done exacting revenge yet; Carla may think she got away with her Liam obsession but she hasn’t…

Finally, it seems that although Janice sort of won the lottery, she’s about to lose her fella. Roger (Andrew Dunn) will make his exit from our screens at the beginning of October after discovering the truth about Janice and Leanne’s lottery win. There are no current plans for Roger to return, but “the door has been left open” according to a Corrie source, so I guess Janice isn’t going to kill him because of what he knows then.
I’ll be bringing your more TV land news as we get it!