Phil and Fern have never been known for their composure, but they surpassed their normal wacky behaviour when they collapsed into a giggle fit lasting six minutes today.

It all started badly when Fern apologised for her slight lisp due to having a tooth removed. Philip began to mock her whistles and the laughing started there. Then the pair moved on to discuss Jeremy Paxman’s pants and his recent complaint to M&S bosses about their lack of support. In between sniggering the pairs conversation went:

Fern: “Do you feel like a pant rant? Because we might do pants tomorrow.”
Phillip: “I think we should do a test of all sorts of different pants. Like that (jumps up and down, lunges).”
Fern: “Oh I like that.”
Phillip: “Currently I’m very happy with my pants.”
Fern: “Are you comfy with your pants?”
Phillip: “Yes, I’m happy with my pants.”
Fern: “Because what makes a good pant? You want to feel the undercarriage is secure and snug. You don’t want them wobbling around.”
Phillip: “Yes, yes, undercarriage stowed.”
Fern: “Flaps up!”
(Both collapse in hysterics)
Phillip: “Not down”
Fern: “No.”
Phillip: “Cos the last thing you want is your undercarriage ripped off.”
Fern: “At speed.”