Why I LOVE How Clean Is Your House?


Over the weekend, I caught an episode of How Clean Is Your House and was duly reminded of how much I love this show!

The presenters, Kim Woodburn and Aggie MacKenzie are hilarious and even though it’s pretty much always the same gunge and grime – just a different address and a different weirdo living there – it’s still fascinating watching.

I love how Kim usually ends up sticking a manicured red fingernail into a toilet bowl while Aggie gags and warns her of the dire consequences or when they find a grill pan that’s not been cleaned in the last hundred years and Kim does likewise; it’s epic…

And really, whoever came up with the idea for this show must’ve been a selling genius to persuade any network to buy it; who’d have thought that a show in which we see someone else’s grotty house getting cleaned week after week could ever be remotely interesting? But it is.

I’d love to know if Kim and Aggie actually do any of the cleaning themselves – other than when Kim does one of her potion thingys – or if it’s all left to the ‘team’? Even though it often shows the ladies cleaning, I doubt they do the really nitty gritty stuff.

One of the things I love most is being able to sit there and say things like, “How can they live like that??” in a shocked voice to whoever happens to be in the room with me. And doing things like making someone come running in from the kitchen to see the state of someone else’s kitchen has a certain piquancy that you just don’t get with many other shows.

Plus, it is actually interesting to know what gruesome bacteria and icky things lie in wait for those who’re hygienically challenged… some of it really makes my skin crawl when Aggie shows it in microscopic detail, all critter-like and fungal… ewwwwwwwwww.

how clean is your house rank loo

Additionally, it makes us viewers feel like we personally live in the cleanest house in the country, even if, like me, housework isn’t your forte but you are familiar with the loo brush and bleach. Actually, it’s hard to choose which is the worst scenario on HCIYH… a minging loo that’s so stained, it makes one wonder if the house’s occupants are deliberately smearing poop around with a stick or something, or a kitchen so repulsive, the rodent’s have all left looking for somewhere nicer to live.

And I just don’t get how the people who feature on the show can ever show their faces in public again! Take the owner of the home in this clip for instance, James, who’s a “professional dog walker”… just watch the clip then tell me if you’d ever, but ever, step outside your door again for fear of being recognised!

I always wonder if these people are nutters or something; I mean seriously, what sane person allows their home to get that rank? I know the word ‘nutters’ is both glib and condescending but in all honestly, I really think they must have psychological problems. Like the guy in the clip with all that rubbish and stuff in bags everywhere; it smacks of some kind of hoarding OCD or something surely?

Paul Copley

Paul Copley

But nonetheless, with Paul Copley’s wry and sarcastic narration and of course Kim and Aggie’s horror and chiding, this is a fabulous show that it’s easy to forget about if a series isn’t currently on a major channel at peak times, but it’s well worth hunting out on the multitude of ‘repeat’ channels!

It’s worth tuning in just to see the variety of sucking-on-a-lemon faces Kim pulls as she calls the homeowners “lazy beggars” or even better, “filthy beggars”. Awesome.

In fact, if you’ve been inspired to watch it again too – as I was on seeing it over the weekend – it’s on today at 4pm on More4 when the girls travel to Milton Keynes to sort out the hideous nightmare of a home that computer programmer Marc Bangs lives in. I’ll be watching!


Lynn is an editor and writer here at Unreality TV and is trained psychotherapist and the author of two books. She's addicted to soaps, period drama and reality TV shows such as X Factor, I'm A Celeb and Big Brother.